I really love homeschooling. I’ve been at it almost six years so I can say that with some level of confidence. Yes, I really love it.
I believe fully that my calling in life is to raise up my children in the knowledge of the Lord. I believe that I am supposed to be teaching them with love and encouragement at the level of their own abilities. I believe that I am called to nurture them for the spirited little beings that they are. I believe it’s my job to foster their natural desires to create. I believe that the best learning happens right out in the middle of God’s creation, and I can take them there. ME. Mom. We can explore and enjoy, live and learn.
Yes, I really love homeschooling, but there are some days I really don’t like it very much. (I’ve been at it almost 6 years so I can say that with some level of confidence.)
There are days I wonder what in the world I am doing. It would be so much easier to just put the kids in school, enjoy the 6 hours of silence, and do whatever I want to do for a change. I could boost our income significantly with all that extra time. I could take an exercise class or spend it reading or lunching with friends. Or I could be productive creating things in the kitchen without the incessant interruptions and offers to ‘help.’ I could actually have a really clean and completely organized house for the first time in ten years. I could really USE an extra 6 hours each day.
But then I remember it isn’t about me at all. IT. ISN’T. ABOUT. ME.
So, on those days I find myself praying a bit more than usual. I pray for wisdom to teach, guidance to do the right thing, strength to hold my ground. I pray for a big boat load of patience, with a cherry on top. Mostly, I pray for some form of confirmation that I am doing what I’m supposed to be doing.
Then, inevitably, I get hit in the face with the answer. Repeatedly.
It usually happens in reading scripture. Those are the days I seem to fall upon something about how to raise up your children, personal perseverance and doing the tough stuff because it’s right. I see it in my devotional. Many times it will also come in the devotionals of one or both boys. On the same day. Then an acquaintance (or often a complete stranger) will volunteer an opinion with me about how I’m doing the right thing; that they can’t imagine my kids in school, that they’d homeschool if they had it to do over again. It comes in the form of a group of homeschooling families who also have hard days but who encourage and support one another. And usually, it’s rounded off with one of my girlfriends telling me some horrid story about the public school system, a story that makes me a tad crazy — and that just seals the deal in my mind.
Okay, okay, Lord. I get it. For right now, I am right where I need to be.
I will continue to work hard and make personal sacrifices for the bigger picture, for the good of my children and for the glory of God.
Because it isn’t about me.
This post has been linked to Works for Me Wednesday over at We Are That Family.